Penyesalan.

Esok aku akan ke Miri bersama Datin. Penerbangan MAS pukul 2.00 petang. Ini kali kedua aku ke sana.

NOTA TAK PENTING: Untuk kawan2 di Miri, terutama Adik Alom dan suaminya, Wak Non... Sila la belanja. :D

Pagi tadi, aku dan Kak Pazila menemubual enam calon untuk mengisi dua jawatan kosong - kerani. Aku kagum dengan artwork salah seorang daripada calon2 berkenaan yang mempunyai diploma dalam bidang rekabentuk grafik. Malangnya, jawatan tersebut tidak relevan untuk orang yang berkelayakan dan berbakat seperti beliau.

Rupa2nya, baru aku sedar, sangat sukar untuk mendapat pekerjaan yang terjamin di luar sana. Aku bersyukur. Walaupun berjauhan dengan bini tersayang, kami berdua mempunyai pekerjaan tetap dengan sebuah Syarikat yang besar. Syarikat yang banyak berjasa kepada kami dan ramai orang, secara langsung atau tidak.

NOTA: Ayat ikhlas. Tidak sinikal. Tiada maksud tersirat.

InsyaAllah, aku akan setia kepada Syarikat. Tetapi, prioriti aku tetap kepada keluarga. Dalam situasi sekarang, prioriti masih tidak berubah. Berjauhan, untuk Syarikat, demi keluarga.

Mungkin ini yang dinamakan pengorbanan?

Jika ya, pengorbanan aku dan bini tersayang mungkin hanya sekelumit daripada segantang yang telah ditaburkan oleh kakitangan2 lain, di sini dan di seluruh dunia. Ada yang telah bergadai nyawa, dan terkorban, demi memastikan Syarikat terus berjaya. Daripada segantang pengorbanan inilah, terbentang sebendang tuaian yang dikongsi bersama.

Semua orang dapat merasa. Tak banyak, sikit. Secara langsung atau tidak langsung. Termasuk aku. Hasil daripada pengorbanan yang segantang itu.

Buat orang yang menjerit2 tidak puas hati terhadap sesuatu perubahan, atau untuk menuntut perubahan, menunjuk perasaan, ditangkap dan dihumban masuk lokap, lalu diwar2kan sebagai 'pengorbanan'; tidakkah lebih elok jika tenaga itu digunakan untuk bekerja, atau berniaga, atau belajar memperbaiki hidup - diri sendiri dan orang lain - agar lebih berguna kepada masyarakat?

Bagi aku, pengorbanan membawa hasil, jika tidak kepada diri sendiri, kepada orang lain.

Eh.

Apa aku melalut ni?


p/s: Semua entri di blog ini telah berjaya dilabel. Yeay~

Reply.

Dear valued staff,

It seems that the incident just now may have sent the wrong message to all of you. Fearing this, I have decided to write this explanation to you. I hope through this explanation, you would understand why I couldn't control my emotion when I posed the final question to our VP and the two GMs during our Town Hall this morning.

My intended question was simple: HR take care of the people, but who will take care of HR?

My mistake was to comment on the video presentation which I honestly think have some impact on my emotional stability this morning. The video tells about the sacrifices that have been made, and have to be made by the employees of this Company, and also their respective family, to drive this Company further, and further.

I related the message from the video, to my own personal experiences within the first year of employment with this Company. Truthfully, I've gained a lot. So, did my wife.

We will always be very grateful for the sponsorship the Company gave us to pursue our bachelor's degree. If not for that sponsorship, we may have not met each other, fall in love and got married.

But now, we have to sacrifice our time together by being over 300km apart of each other, also because of the sponsorship.

I understand that it takes a few years for us to get the approval for a transfer, and I could wait. However, at times, I do question whether is it worth the wait.

The most valueable and irreplaceable asset that all of us have is time. Money cannot buy time. No reward is worth the time - quality time - spent with the people we love and care about.

I have learnt this while I was growing up.

When I was asking the question to our VP and our two GMs this morning, I realized that all these years, I was always being taken away from the people I love.

When I was two, I was taken away from my parents, to be raised by my grandparents. I could only see my parents during school holidays. I recall being abused - most of the time emotionally, sometimes physically - by my late Pak Teh.

When I was twelve, I went to a boarding school, away from my family. You may have heard or read the stories about bullying by seniors which I need not to elaborate. I managed to stay for almost two years, and finally fit in. However, I had my first epileptic attack and was transferred out from the school to stay with my family. I went to an ordinary school.

Between then and the day I got into another boarding school, were the happiest days of my life.

Now, I'm taken away again, by the Company, from my wife. I've been given a job which is different from what I've studied, on a position - and work load - of a senior executive but with an entry-level salary of a fresh graduate.

These realization suddenly touched the soft spot, and tears started rolling down my cheek.

I apologize for the change in mood it caused, and thank you for reading this.

Regards,
MSA

p/s: The message was never sent.

Kekasih.

Ahad.

Bini tersayang: Waktu Nabi terima wahyu pertama, Nabi menggigil kan?

Aku: A ah.

Bini tersayang: Lepas tu Khadijah selimutkan. Nabi cakap dia nampak lagi...

Aku: Nampak Jibril?

Bini tersayang: A ah. Tapi, Nabi tak tahu lagi kan tu apa...

Aku: Pastu?

Bini tersayang: Lepas tu, Khadijah peluk Nabi. Nabi gigil lagi. Nabi still nampak...
Aku: Ye ke? Pastu?

Bini tersayang: Lepas tu, Nabi masuk dalam baju Khadijah. Khadijah tanya, nampak lagi? Nabi cakap tak nampak dah... So, Khadijah cakap, yang Nabi nampak tu, benda baik.

Aku: Sebab apa?

Bini tersayang: Khadijah cakap, sebab benda tu malu... He he he

Aku: Eh... Hehehe

p/s: Siapa pula yang google 'cara beritahu keluarga untuk berkahwin' dan sampai ke blog ni? Kelakar sungguh, tapi intriguing.

Ambiguity?

Last Friday was the last day for previous batch of UTP interns, after eight month with us. I was one of their supervisors. I supervised Ani, a student in Business Information System. I've assigned her to develop an online training budget monitoring system, so that I could effectively manage the unit's training budget in the future.

A simple farewell party was done for them on Wednesday.

It was expected from the interns to say something about their new experiences, but I certainly did not expect Dr J, the dept boss to call the supervisors to give their comment on the interns in front of everybody.

"It is the best memory in my life," Ani, after crediting her SV (read: me!) and the rest of the people in the section, with teary eyes of course.

My turn to say something.

"I'm happy with her. She developed the system and helped us a lot with our works,"

Paused.

"But she's very stubborn!" I blurted, causing laughter to break across the room. Ani blushed, and was wiping off her tears.

I continued, "well, serve me right for being as stubborn to my boss, Datin..."

"We argue a lot... most of the time she didn't agree with my suggestion and I don't want to listen to her arguement, though I have to admit some of them make sense and she's right..."

"I guess its my ego..."

"I believe he's speaking on behalf of the men!" Datin suddenly added.

I ended my remark with, "Well, good luck to Ani, and all the best. Thank you..."

So, that was it.

Later, on a separate occasion, Dr J commented, "She is not stubborn, Sayuti. She's persistence..."

And we smiled.


p/s: Good luck to the students of UTP for the new semester. Break is over. Deal with it.

Salmon.

Pagi tadi, sebelum bertolak ke ofis.

Aku: Hari ni tak nak beli sandwic. Muak doh.
Parid: Sian pakcik tu Sayut, menanti pelanggan tetap...
Aku: Ahh... takde kesian2. Aku buat2 tak nampak je nanti.
Parid: (Gelak) Ko memang tak berhati perut! (Gelak)
Aku: Dah lama kerja HR... jadi tak berhati perut la aku! (Muka serius)

Parid tenung. Aku tak tahan dengan tenungan menggeletek beliau. Kami tergelak.

Ketika tersebut, aku sedang mengopek ketulan 'iceberg' dalam freezer yang telah diset kepada defrost sejak semalaman.

Parid: Jom.
Aku: Ko pegi dulu. Aku lambat.

NOTA: Kalau aku tak kopek dan set balik freezer kepada frost, nanti habis basah lantai dapur bila 'iceberg' freezer defrost sepenuhnya.

Pukul 7.58 pagi, aku baru turun dari tren STAR di stesen Masjid Jamek. Aku tengok ke bawah. Aku nampak pakcik jual sandwich berkenaan. Beliau sedang meninjau2, seperti keresahan.

"Ah, dem!" aku.

Sampai ke bawah stesen, aku lintas jalan. Berjalan ke arah pakcik tersebut. Seluk poket, keluar duit.

"Last ni... ingatkan dah tak datang," pakcik berkenaan bercakap, sambil mengeluarkan pek sandwich tuna dan keju dari bawah pek2 sandwic yang lain.. Kemudian, beliau masukkan dalam beg plastik bersama pek sandwic tuna dan sardin.

Aku keluarkan duit RM 3.30, bayar dan berpusing ke stesen LRT PUTRA.

Hari ni, aku gagal untuk tidak berhati perut.


p/s: *sigh*

Budget.

Today, I learned about the value of data, well, actually, the value to manage the data. With a currency sign, it's an eight-figures number.

In certain occasion, people claim the data they have are useless. It is not the data, but it is them who don't know how to use the data.

Data, is invalueable.

'Tis because data is the base of information. Through the interpretation of data, we gain information. From the understanding of the information, we gain knowledge. As they say, knowledge is power.

Unlike everything else, our knowledge will increase if we share. If we share our food, we'll only gain a portion out of it. If we share our money, we'll only get poorer. But if we share our knowledge, we gain more.

Wait...

Come to think about it, if we share our power, we'll lose our authority. This means the saying, 'knowledge is power' in this sense is not correct, because we lose power if we share our power, whereby we gain knowledge if we share our knowledge. So, why are we still using the quote 'knowledge is power'? Who quoted that in the first place anyway?

Let us wonder about that some other day, shall we? Back to the topic.

From the understanding of the information which we got from the interpretation of data, we gain knowledge. From the knowledge we have, we make decisions. Desicions, lead to action.

And for every action, there is an equal reaction. That's Newton Third Law, as we learned in Physics.

Wait, that doesn't sound right in this context. Let us try something else on 'action'.

OK.

Action, leads to consequence. As we learned about the consequences of our action, we gain experience. Understanding the experience, we gain wisdom.

Wisdom, is priceless, because it leads to enlightenment.

But, we cannot have wisdom without experience and knowledge. We cannot have knowledge without information. And we cannot have the information without interpreting the data.

That is why, data is invalueable.


p/s: This is the reason I'm so stressed out when someone asks for some information that I don't have and there is no data for me to interpret. Therefore, *carutan*, *carutan* and more *carutan* to the *undisclosed recipient*.